Sign in to Purchase Instantly. Usually ships within 6 days. Overview How to overcome challenges with confidence No matter how successful we are, we all face stressful and hard-to-handle challenges in daily life, and — if we want to be as happy and healthy as we can — we must learn to assert ourselves, make our voices heard and approach life with confidence and self-assurance. About the Author Suzanne Potts is a motivational speaker and an expert in assertiveness, who specialises in keynote speaking for industry conferences, corporate events and charity forums.
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The book offers everything the beginning player needs to know, from the necessary equipment to the basic rules of the game, with explanations Inside, over pages of Linux topics are Inside, over pages of Linux topics are organized into eight task-oriented mini books that help you understand all aspects of the latest OS distributions of the most popular open-source operating system in Menopause For Dummies. Assertiveness is a way of life. It is like a badge you wear into each interaction.
In fact, once you make the effort to become a more assertive person and, you demonstrate that you will apply your assertiveness skills; you will find that you rarely need to be assertive. At the same time, they know that you will respect them too so, your relationships naturally become more amicable. Do you feel that you can stand up for yourself, your values and your beliefs while respecting others, their values and their beliefs An assertive person should be able to do each of the following 12 things; how many would you feel comfortable doing?
During everyday discussion, we rarely use facts. You are perfectly entitled to offer your opinion, as is everyone else. Respect should flow both ways i. You should always feel comfortable enough to express your opinion. If others wish to disagree, they are of course entitled to do so. So be it. Sometimes, it is best to keep quiet and let people figure things out for themselves. They just wanted the validation of having you agree with them. Maybe they were experiencing doubt about their opinion and they hoped that you would agree with them, thus increasing their confidence.
An assertive person, while having full confidence in their opinion will know that there are times when there is nothing to be gained from expressing that opinion. So, they will refrain from doing so. In fact, an assertive person will usually consider the following before expressing their opinion:. When you meet somebody new, it provides many opportunities.
Assertiveness: How To Be Strong In Every Situation | Books | Assertiveness, Strong
Ranging from the opportunity to pass a few enjoyable moments; to the opportunity to invite somebody special into your life where they will play a significant role. Every encounter is also an opportunity to learn something new, about yourself, about the other person or about life in general. I recently watched a documentary about prisons which included one prisoner who has worked hard to rehabilitate himself whilst in prison.
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They read:. No man is your friend. It can seem daunting to have to speak up in a group but there is something very important you should remember about groups. Groups usually form around people with common interests, goals and objectives. Like you, others are usually there for a reason. These other people want you to feel comfortable and, if you think you may have something of value to add, they want to hear it.
1. When you’re dealing with a confrontational person
Assertiveness is as much about treating others with respect and dignity as it is about ensuring that you are treated with respect and dignity. So along with adding any value you have to offer; you will listen actively to others and where you feel that somebody has something of value to offer but is reluctant to say it; you will invite them to speak and ensure that they are heard.
In fact, the quickest way to ensure that you are respected is by offering that level of respect to others. Demonstrate it by treating them with the desired level of respect. After all, its easier to interpret clear actions than muddled words.
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Read 8 Tips to master compassionate communication. In fact, in many social situations, the sign of someone who is comfortable is not speaking up and being heard by everybody. The person who is most comfortable in a social situation is the person who is actively listening. An assertive person listens attentively; staying silent where necessary and asking appropriate questions where necessary.
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As someone who suffered with anxiety and depression in my younger years; I know that the time I am least comfortable in a social situation is when I am speaking a lot. If I am constantly speaking, I am not listening. As I have become more of an assertive person, I have started to slow down, shut up and listen.
Though I will be the first to admit that I still have room to improve. Attentive, active listeners are more assertive than those who strive to be the centre of attention. Most people can easily go through the day without ever saying it. You cannot be successful in life unless you take charge of your time, energy and resources but when you agree to something against your will, you are allowing somebody else to control you.
An assertive person always takes control of their own life. What you are doing is taking responsibility for yourself. An assertive person understands that they cannot do everything that they would like to do. Read The power of no - Why you should decline. Especially when their feelings are strong. They worry about upsetting others.
Instead, they just try to bottle those feelings up and get on with things. Feeling are like problems and, as David Allen says about problems:. Either way, you are going to have to deal with them eventually. Then, when your are finally forced to deal with them, you will be dealing with a far bigger problem.
An assertive person does not let the intensity of his feelings grow. He deals with these situations when they show up so that they never blow up. Again, it is important that I stress that not every opinion, strong or otherwise, must be expressed. An assertive person will always consider the benefit of expressing their opinion. Occasionally, a little conflict can be both healthy and necessary. However, if there is nothing to be gained from expressing your opinion, and the potential for conflict is high; it might be better to leave the other person hold onto whatever opinion they have.
As my good friend Jamie likes to say:. If you make a mistake; take responsibility for it. When I talk about assertiveness, which I do on a regular basis, I usually talk about the need to stand up and speak up when others have said, or done, something wrong. If it is important, you should feel free and comfortable to say so; preferably in a respectful manner. When we hold others to a higher standard, it helps everyone to raise their game. Of course, an assertive person will not just stop at holding others to higher standards.
source url You must apply the same standards to yourself. Many people are afraid to own up to mistakes and admit to weaknesses.
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They fear that it makes them look bad in the eyes of others and they will lose respect. But few things win the respect of others as quick as an honest admission of a mistake. But take responsibility for your actions, identify what you did wrong, determine what you can do better and put it into action. Read How being responsible can change your life. We all struggle from time to time.
Those who struggle least probably encounter the same number of struggles as everybody else.
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